Recognizing Kobe Bryant’s immense fallibility does not extinguish his greatest triumphs, and celebrating his life should not exonerate him from his most unavoidable wrongdoings.
Last year, I was diagnosed with complex PTSD from ongoing childhood trauma. As a sexual assault survivor and abuse victim, I had already spent hours in therapy working to heal the long-term shame and fear that coursed through my body after enduring so much in my youth., the clarity and affirmation I received from it both relieved and saddened me. Here was concrete proof of the abuse I had endured. Here was the validation my story so deeply needed.
Evolving in this way has helped me realize that no matter how destructive or empowering our influence, we are all just complicated, messy, and vulnerable human beings in this world. A few hours later, something unexpected happened. The collective grief I was experiencing along with so many other people in the world was joined by an emotion that completely blindsided me. I began to feel overwhelming uneasiness at seeing the countless Kobe Bryant life tributes at every turn that showcased the glowing highlights of his life on and off the court.
While Bryant certainly went on to achieve great things in his career and personal life, the abuse he was publicly accused of had a ripple effect on so many others who have experienced sexual assault in their own lives. I want to be able to say this truth out loud and know that my conflicting emotions are as valid as any other person who mourns for him. I want to be able to talk openly about the most challenging area of this man’s life while also feeling immense grief and compassion for his untimely death.
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