Advice from Annie Lane.
about the caregiver who felt worn out prompted a deluge of letters, mostly from others who are, or have been, caregivers themselves. As I read the letters, I thought of the fact that airlines tell mothers to put on their own oxygen masks first and then help their children. Here is a sampling of the letters we received:: Please add to the caregiver that human beings have a finite mental capacity for each day.
Caregiver is mentally exhausted due to the load he or she is carrying and needs to find ways to lessen that burden. Too many people don’t realize the impact of stress on functionality and hold themselves to too high a standard. Caregiver should decide what tasks are most important for them, get help with things that are needed but that others could do, and focus on the tasks that would make them feel happy and productive.First, let me start by saying that reading your column is the marriage to my morning cup of coffee. I have never responded or written to you, but I just read about the caregiver who is taking care of their partner and is overtaken by exhaustion.
I’m the sole caregiver of my husband with severe combat-related PTSD; he is in his early 30s. The online support I found is amazing, because the people I know in person do not have real life experience with the everyday struggles that we have. It’s so helpful to have a support system, even if it’s just a message online asking if you’re OK from someone who knows what you’re going through.
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