’Tis the season for both.
After her father falls off of a ladder while stringing Christmas lights, driven New York City career woman Lindsay Lohan is forced to play nursemaid and spend the holidays in the picturesque New England village that she thought she’d left behind.
A six-hundred-pound man hasn’t left his squalid home in months, wallowing in self-loathing and masturbating to Internet porn. But there’s still time to save Christmas—if only Head Elf Tinkles can convince Santa to stop binge eating fudge, candy canes, and entire gingerbread houses—and get back on his sleigh! Cue a training montage and a speech about “inner holiday spirit.” Tech mogul and single dad Ashton Kutcher hates Christmas.
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