What if you were sitting up in the nosebleeds? The cheap seats? The farthest reaches of the yard? Where is the worst seat at Oracle Park? And who’s sitting there? Find out ⤵️
Me and Oracle Park? We go way back. I remember touring the place while it was under construction, hard hat and all. One of the big selling points was that every seat had a PalmPilot charger. That should give you a sense of the timing here.
In the true spirit of adventure and investigation, I set out to find the poor soul. It was an arduous journey, fraught with peril and obstacles. Stairs were climbed. Crowds were threaded. Provisions were obtained. My hearty band of explorers — made up of my wife and two children — charted a course to the most inhospitable destination of them all. Section 336 ... beyond the left field foul pole.
Man, these seats were up high. They were so high... my nosebleed gotta nosebleed ... the beer guy brought a sherpa with him ... I could watch the Dodgers game, too ... The guy next to me was wearing lederhosen ... Sir Edmund Hillary was sitting three rows below us ... we used the Hubble Telescope to call balls and strikes ... I saw an ant playing shortstop ... the Salesforce Tower got jealous. The seats were so high up ... it was wonderful.
“It’s the very last seat in the stadium,” said Garfin, wrestling with her sons, Sammy and Jake, who were getting antsy in the late innings. “And it’s wonderful. I can see everything.” Over in the right field upper deck, far above McCovey Cove, we discovered Section 302, the polar opposite to the left field cheap seats. It was nice and shady over here, with a cool breeze keeping fans happy. You could see the entire field and there was even a beer guy peddling Coors Light. I began the final ascent, once again alone. Once again hoofing up 64 steps to reach the very last seat in the world.
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