BLOOMINGTON, IN—A new study released Monday by sociologists at Indiana University found that women will always answer their telephones unless mind-blowing sex with a man other than the caller prevents them from doing so.
The findings were consistent across all demographic groups in a sampling of 500 females between the ages of 18 to 35, which included women who were romantically involved with the caller but had requested some time apart to clear their heads, as well as women who had dated the caller briefly but assumed it was understood by both parties that the relationship had not worked out.
The study revealed that 80 percent of the time, women who declined to answer their phones were, at that very moment, being sexually pleasured by a man superior to the caller in terms of looks, genital endowment, and stamina. Researchers also found that a majority of women picked up the phone, examined the caller ID, and told their male lover "It's nobody" before continuing with sexual intercourse.
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