From the Magazine: One year ago, she went public with abuse allegations against New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman. Her life hasn’t been the same since.
Tanya Selvaratnam got the news around 7 p.m. on May 7, 2018, while at a dinner party. It came in the form of a text message from David Remnick, editor of the New Yorker, saying: The story is up. Selvaratnam immediately turned to her friend Julia Chaplin. “I think I need to leave,” she said.
It wasn’t until hours later, after she had left the party and was back at her friend’s house, that Selvaratnam finally worked up the courage to read the article, which was headlined: “Four Women Accuse New York’s Attorney General of Physical Abuse.
It’s not a choice any woman expects to have to make. Selvaratnam didn’t. When she first met Eric Schneiderman at the Democratic National Convention in July 2016, she found a lot to like. He was a politician with a seemingly bright future. Like her, he spoke Mandarin. He was interested in meditation and Buddhist philosophy, and he cared about many of the same progressive causes that were important to her.
According to Selvaratnam, he was also increasingly moody — getting angry with her for working at the dining room table or on the couch, as though she was bothering him just by taking up space. Alcohol intensified the bouts of darkness, she says. When Schneiderman drank, he became unhinged, criticizing her appearance and telling her she needed to see a plastic surgeon about the scars from her cancer surgery.
In September 2017, Selvaratnam was in Los Angeles, filming an interview with the actress Nicole Kidman for Glamour magazine’s Women of the Year Awards . Earlier in the year, Kidman had co-starred alongside Reese Witherspoon, Laura Dern and Shailene Woodley in “Big Little Lies,” an HBO series in which Kidman plays a wealthy, outwardly privileged woman who’s the victim of intimate partner violence at the hands of her husband.
Four days later, the accusations of sexual abuse against producer Harvey Weinstein broke in the New York Times. When the story came out, Selvaratnam was in the Glamour office; the news felt stomach-churning. A few days after that, the New Yorker published Farrow’s lengthy, damning investigation in which several women accused Weinstein of assault. That same day, Schneiderman emailed Selvaratnam. “I think we should talk,” he wrote. “I want to continue to support your good work.
But the knowledge of what he’d done, and what she feared he might do to other women, weighed on her. She connected with the lawyer Robbie Kaplan — who in January 2018 co-founded the Time’s Up Legal Defense Fund to provide resources to women who have been sexually harassed in the workplace — to discuss her options. Selvaratnam wondered if something could be done privately, negotiated through legal representatives, to make sure that Schneiderman wouldn’t hurt anyone else.
“That was the moment when I felt like I had to figure out what to do,” she says. “I was convinced that no one should have the memories that either of us had.” Your notes of support have sustained me over the last week. I am sorry not to respond to each note individually. But as Selvaratnam talked with friends who’d also experienced abuse, she became convinced that a book was necessary. “None of us were talking about it with each other, because it’s so embarrassing,” she says. “It’s humiliating. It’s disgusting. That’s what I want people to get more educated about. It’s not the kind of thing that they prepare you for.
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