'The short of it is: I'm having an affair because I'm miserable in my marriage.'
, when it happens, there are underlying reasons why the person chose to do it.Recently, I stumbled upon a decade-old thread where a user wanted to know just that when theyThe thread got hundreds of responses from people who gave the reasons — and they were all varied — on why they cheated on their S.O. Below are some of the top and most up-voted responses:"I cheated in a longterm relationship once.
Over time it became apparent that I felt a strong attraction to him, and when I told him that I was concerned about it, and thought that perhaps we should step back, he confessed the same attraction. It was a really difficult process to go through because neither of us wanted to be an adulterer, but in the end, I realized that this person made me happy in a way my husband had never made me feel.
"Now, looking back on it, there was no reason that it was OK. Something in my head wanted to cheat for whatever reason. I strongly think it was a matter of wanting attention, validation, and feeling that I was desirable.""You get stuck in the monotony of the relationship, and its routines at times make you feel the urge to take risks because that's the only thing that gets the endorphins going.
It didn't last long. My wife found out and was very upset. I broke off contact with the other woman and avoided inappropriate online conversations since. That was 4 1/2 years ago, and I still haven't heard the end of it. "I did this twice over the course of three years, and ultimately ended the marriage before she found out. I sought out counseling to determine the 'why's' of how I had let this come to pass, as I had considered myself a better man than that. I learned that respect was dead and that I was a complete coward.
"As I progressed with different partners, I started to become angry with her for what she was making me do. She started to grow attached to me again, but I just didn't love her anymore. I'm selfish. I ignored her, and she hated me for it; we ended our engagement after two weeks of me, almost completely, ignoring her. She still doesn't know what I did, and who I did it with, even though she has met most of them.
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