Nobody—Including Teachers—Should Criticize What I Pack In My Kid’s Lunch

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Nobody—Including Teachers—Should Criticize What I Pack In My Kid’s Lunch
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'If he didn’t eat those things, He. Would. Not. Eat. At. All.'

When my son was in third grade, he came home to tell me that one of the lunch aides at his school had complained that he only had “snacks” in his“Maybe you should start packing me sandwiches again, Mom,” he said, half-joking, but obviously unhappy with being judged in this way.The problem with his suggestion was that every sandwich I had made for him in the history of his elementary school career had gone untouched. He ate sandwiches just fine at home, but school was a different story.

Of course, this lunch aide didn’t know any of that. And while her comment didn’t bother me that much, it did get under my skin, especially because I could tell that my son felt some shame about what happened. At the time, I thought I was the only one whose kid had been questioned about their food choices at school. But I am far from alone. Since then, I have heard many stories of parents who have been scolded and shamed in similar ways.

The thing to remember is that when you send a kid home with a disciplinary note over something like eating, you are food shaming them, no two ways about it. What we do or do not eat is very personal and really no one’s freaking business. Furthermore, shaming a child in this way—especially such a small kid—isn’t without ramifications.

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