What the hell were you doing reading your girlfriend’s private diary! No! This is not something we do as humans!
! No! This is not something we do as humans! We do not simply dip into the diaries, or emails, or text messages of people we love and respect. We do not break these sacred contracts, wade gormlessly into our partners’ inner thoughts, and glob around there, judging.
I’m struggling to think of an occasion where this would be OK, and all I can come up with is: you have reason to believe she has committed a terrible, possibly bloody crime, your family is in danger, and the only evidence is inside her diary. And even then, I’d have questions. I am even uncomfortable watching crime procedurals when, following a girl’s murder, investigators pore over her diary for clues.
I’m surprised she’s still talking to you, to be honest. Can you trust her? Tell you what: I know for sure that she can’t trust you. You’ve shown you’re not mature enough to be in a real relationship. You’ve led with your insecurities, and sneakily, too. If there was anything good and real holding you two together before this, you’ve taken a match to it.
Of course, there’s a chance your girlfriend is less furious about this betrayal than I am – perhaps she has a more forgiving soul . If so – if she’s willing to stay in this relationship – then you have the opportunity to grow up, to change, to become trustworthy and adult enough to live in a relationship where you can accept and honour each other’s inner lives, with all their mess and ink.
Listen to her. Talk. Don’t go prowling into her private notes. There’s a much simpler way to work out what your partner is thinking. Simply pay attention.
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