My story of cryptic pregnancy.
Of course, we didn’t know exactly how many weeks pregnant I was when I gave birth, but the doctors thought she was over two weeks late because of how wrinkly she was, and they told me she weighed 6 pounds, 14 ounces. My mum suggested picking a name to help me bond with her. “You’ve always loved the name Willow,” she suggested. I looked at her and it just fit perfectly.
Eventually, the nurse advised my mum to go home, and I was put on a ward with another woman. I stayed up all night texting my mum, asking, ‘How do I know when Willow needs feeding and changing?’ as I didn’t know the first thing about babies. I discharged myself the next morning and mum came to pick me up. When we took Willow home, I think I was still in shock. In fact, I’m not sure it’s ever worn off. I was never even sure I wanted kids, and while other mums have all those months to prepare both physically and psychologically, I was thrown totally in the deep end. I knew absolutely nothing about babies, none of my friends had them, and it was tough. I don’t think I properly held my daughter until the next day after we arrived home.
I knew I had to tell Willow’s father, Rob. We’d been seeing each other for a few months when Willow was conceived, but we’d decided to split because it just wasn’t the right time. It was a mutual decision, and we didn’t end on bad terms. Still, I was terrified about telling him. How would he react? Would he want to be a part of Willow’s life? I waited three days, then I knew I had to say something .
I sat on the sofa praying that he wouldn’t call me, but he called me straight away. My heart was racing, but it needn’t have been. To my relief, Rob was so happy and excited. He told me how proud he was of me, and that he couldn’t wait to meet her. He came over the next day and was absolutely smitten. It was a like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
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