how to know when to take the next step 💓
have sex . But these same questions are worth asking any time we’re contemplating sex with a new person.
In this spirit, I’ve come up with a handy checklist of questions to ask yourself before you embark on a new sexual relationship. However, I feel compelled to say that being prepared for physically— preparing birth control and STI protection ahead of time; slowing down so it doesn’t hurt; going to the gyno and getting tested for STIs regularly — has a huge impact on emotional safety, too. If you feel in control of your own health and bodily safety, you’ll be more relaxed and confident.
When it comes to sex, there are often a lot of parties weighing in on both sides of the spectrum. There may be parents, religious figures, or slut-shaming cultural messages telling you that sex is bad or a sin. There may be friends, peers, and sex-positive pop culture figures saying that not only is sex amazing, but you’re kind of a loser if you don’t do it. It’s not easy, but this is the time to block out all the noise and ask yourselfyou’re exploring this sexual relationship.
requires both people to be considerate, present, and honest. Ask yourself if this person seems up for the task.Even the most casual of sexual arrangements can result in a flood of confusing, exhilarating, devastating feelings. The
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