Don’t Date Up: Why You Should Stay In Your Own League

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Don’t Date Up: Why You Should Stay In Your Own League
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When people are seeking their perfect match, they may not get what they think they want. Instead, they may get exactly what they need to have a great relationship. LewandowskiPhD explains why.

online dating

Highly attractive participants were more interested in contacting high mate value partners, while less attractive participants sought lower value partners. However, those lower mate value participants actually preferred the more attractive potential partners; they just weren’t inclined to follow through on that preference.

However, that wishful thinking didn’t really pay off in the study, because those contacts weren’t reciprocated . Instead, users only received messages back when the user was in their league . It seems daters took their shot at better partners—you can’t blame them for trying—but those efforts were unsuccessful.

To test the implications of matching and mismatching partners’ mate values, researchers conducted a study using > 12,000 partner ratings from members of a Namibian community . As in the previously discussed study, participants wanted partners who were more attractive than they were. For example, 3s and 4s wanted 8s and 9s. Again, people aspired to get a partner who was better than them.

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