Dear Abby: I’m struggling with mom’s guilt trips after grandma’s death

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Dear Abby: I’m struggling with mom’s guilt trips after grandma’s death
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My grandma raised me because Mom was an alcoholic and ran the streets with her boyfriend. My grandma died three months ago.

I have always been the outsider in my family. My grandma raised me because Mom was an alcoholic and ran the streets with her boyfriend. My grandma died three months ago, and I have been having a hard time dealing with it.

I am the only child who has anything to do with her , and she uses guilt when I don’t come out and help her clean or go grocery shopping for her. I was raised to believe that we should take care of our elders, but I still have issues with her not being in my life growing up. I don’t know how to handle this without just refusing to go. What should I do?Tell your mother the truth, just as you related it to me.

My husband and I call him every day and visit three to four times a week. His medical issues can be surmounted, but he can no longer schedule appointments and advocate for himself with our overwhelmed medical community. If we press him on it, he gets defensive. He doesn’t seem to want to talk about his medical problems, and he doesn’t understand the burden he’s placing on his son to medically advocate for him .

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